It’s never easy to adopt a child. Shelley Pitts was only 14 when she got pregnant, but she thought it was best for her child. She has been quietly celebrating her son’s birthday since the day she gave him away. They got back together after being apart for more than 30 years.
Shelley Pitts got pregnant when she was 14 years old. She was so young, though, that she thought she could just ignore the fact that she hadn’t had her period and that the pregnancy would go away on its own. She said, “I’m too young to have a child.”
At first, I didn’t know I was going to have a child. I had never heard of the symptoms, which I now know all too well. She said, “My body was changing, but I didn’t know it.” She went on like nothing had happened. During my first trimester, I went to drill team practice before and after school, played softball, and went to California with my mother. Nothing seemed to have changed. I couldn’t ignore the fact that I might be pregnant, but I knew it couldn’t be helped.”
She finally told her boyfriend Sidney after three months. Since they had been together for almost two years, he brought her a lot of comfort. People talked about whether their baby would be a boy or a girl and what they could name him or her. Even though they were happy, they didn’t want to tell their parents.
Shelley did everything she could to keep the truth from coming out. During drill practice, she wore clothes that were too big and hid her stomach with things like pom-poms or a pillow on her lap. They teased their best friends about it, but by the end of the year, everyone at school knew the truth. But the teachers didn’t say anything about it. At the time, it was frowned upon for a teen to get pregnant, and the fact that Shelley was white and Sidney was black made it even worse. In the 1980s, Texas wasn’t the best place for mixed-race couples to live.
The two finally got up the nerve to tell their parents. Adults said that adoption was the only choice. Even though the couple was hurt and upset, it seemed like the right thing to do. After finding an agency that would take mixed-race children, they started the adoption process.
The adoption agency they used gave Shelley a place to stay while she was pregnant. She was able to go to school full-time, see the doctor, and get help while she was there. It was much less stressful than if her mother had tried to do everything on her own. Shelley said that the meeting was both friendly and lonely.
“It broke my heart to leave Sidney behind. I used to see him almost every day, but now we only talk on the phone or by mail. On March 31, I was due. There was a four-month wait. Since I was 4 hours away from home, the days felt like they would never end. Even though my mother came to visit a few weekends, I looked forward to her letters every day. “I read letters and cards from my mom, grandma, and Sidney over and over again,” she said.
She found out the baby was going to be a boy while she was living there. Sidney had also planned to give his name to a baby boy. She mostly did the delivery by herself, with some help from an agency worker. She was going, but she wouldn’t get there in time. Sydney’s parents wouldn’t let him leave because they thought it would be better for him not to go.
Even though other people told her not to, Shelley decided to see and hold the baby before he was taken away. She said that she couldn’t imagine being pregnant and giving birth without being able to hold her son at least once. Shelley looked at his face closely, not sure if it was Sidney’s or not. She gave him to the person helping him.
Even though he was perfect, he wasn’t meant to be mine. I told myself that he would have a better life with his new parents, and when the nurse came to take him away from me, I hoped that was true. When they took him away from me, I didn’t cry. When I cried for the first time, I felt ashamed and like I didn’t deserve to. I had to give up my baby. “How could anyone feel sorry for me?”
Shelley has quietly celebrated her son’s birthday every year since then. Sydney died in a sad way in 1992. Shelley didn’t say if Sidney was the person she married or not.
She only knew that her son had been in foster care for four months and was given the name Eric. Later, he was taken in by a white family. His father was in the military, and his mother worked for the schools.
Shelley decided 33 years later to make a profile on a Facebook page for people who have adopted children. The site then found someone for you who fit the criteria you set. No matches were found for her, which was a shame. A few days later, when his birthday was getting close, she came back. She was an 81 percent match, it turned out.
Her match was a man from Dallas, Texas, who was born on March 29, 1988, the same day as her son. He had brown hair and eyes, and he was taken in by a family when he was four months old. After she sent a message, she waited. On the list was a house address in Virginia, but she hadn’t heard anything.
On the profile, Daniel Smith was named. She used Facebook to find out the person’s name and where they lived. A picture of a black man who was tall, thin, and had light skin was shown. He was there with three children. No one’s birthday was brought up. She knew it was him when she looked at his pictures and saw that he had his father’s lips. Then she found a March 29, 2016, post wishing someone a happy birthday. She knew who it was.
“My heart was in my throat, and I cried tears of happiness as I sent him a quick private message. ” The message said, “I’m your birth mother.” It also wished you a happy birthday. I don’t know how to say it unless I just say it. I hope you’ll write back. I can’t believe I was able to find you.’ At the time, it was 11:23 p.m. I thought you’d answer.”
She sent a message to the person who seemed to be his girlfriend after two days. Shelley’s request to be friends was accepted, and she told Daniel in her reply to Shelley’s message.
“I waited, and Daniel sent me a message on March 31 at 3:10 p.m. Hello. I don’t know where to begin. “I’d like to talk to you.” My heart was broken. My son couldn’t wait to talk to me!”
They started by setting up a phone call, during which they talked for about three hours. He had always planned to find her someday, and he told his friends at school about it.
After a month, Daniel drove all the way to Texas to meet Shelley and his real sisters. It was very sad when they finally met. They held each other for a long time.
We spent the next six days with family, food, and as much love as we could muster. Daniel was loved by my girls, their husbands, and their kids in every way. He took everything in. We sometimes cried happy tears and talked about how much we missed Sidney. During my time at the adoption agency, I gave him letters from his father and notes that were written to me. Before he was born, I wanted him to know that Sidney loved me and Daniel. I wanted to give him something of his father that he could take back to Virginia with him. At the very least, he deserved it.”
source – Kidspot.com.au